We were talking my son and I, about actually the life the universe and everything.

“Why am I still here and not there? ” I asked my wise old teenager!

“Well I can give you the nice answer or the straight answer, what do you want? ” He questioned

We discussed the fact that he could give me a lovely fluffy answer or perhaps a unspiritual reason stripped to the bare essential message.

Humans look for meaning in everything. even if the meaning isn’t an obvious one.

Even if it is a meaning you have found in random things like, a feather falling at your feet, repetition of numbers, or a prickly feeling when someone walks into the room.

But  horror of horror what if the unspiritual reason is that there is no meaning just randomness? Whoa, this is too big for my brain to grasp!

The brain always eagerly reaches out and helpfully finds somewhere to perfectly place everything. Unspiritual reasons lead to reasons. I asked my friend what she thought, because I can’t work out the meaning of it all, she  said,

“Don’t worry I’m still trying to work that out too!”

“Even those glamping-insta folk?”

” Yes even them!”

In midwinter (which barely touches the midwinter of folks in the Arctic) here in my island state we hold festivals. We gather around bonfires burning wicker men and asking spring to come. Really in the ungodlike, pagan way,  we kind of come together looking to find meaning together, rather than alone. In the unknown and the uncertain avowed agnostics say things like, “I believe in climate change” when really pure fact tells us that it is real. When did science and faith meet?

For now it is winter in my southern home where mountain and sea meet and I still look for meaning just like all those fabulous swans on FB who are probably paddling madly beneath the waters.

So for now there is, the IS and the AM

I am here because

• My children are here
• My job is here

“Two is enough unspiritual reasons, there doesn’t need to be anymore” He said

I think we make meaning from each other!

Disappoints hurt

Catch me in my sternum

I expect I will bounce back, I always do

The silence is a widening chasm

That you fail to fill

The sun you know, it still shines

And there are still glorious sunrises and sunsets

I would take a photo

But even this; you do not wish to share

Disappointments make me stronger

Even though I care

To be or not to be?

Ah the gentle art of procrastination. I along with many others can procrastinate on the big and the small. Recently I had cause to discuss procrastination with my eldest, when he asked, for help with his homework, due all too soon. He had procrastinated on it ‘til this last moment!

“What is it you need to work on?” I asked

“Hamlet” he lamented and continued, “What is Hamlet about?”

It was then it dawned on me, here was one of the most brilliant procrastinators of narrative history,

“Hamlet is essentially about a guy who can’t make up his mind”

“Why?”

“Because, you know… the ghost of his father has appeared to him and demanded he vanquish his death because his brother (Hamlet’s uncle; keep up people!) Has killed him and Married Gertrude (Hamlet’s mum) and Hamlet just finds the whole idea challenging”

“Whoa that’s pretty heavy” it dawned on my son, now beginning to see that perhaps Shakespeare is not so boring.

We can all procrastinate on the small: I could clean the house but then it’s so nice laying here in the sunshine eating chocolate, what to do?

Or

I could start packing but my FB feed is so interesting

I could go on a diet but it will have to be maybe like tomorrow because it would be rude not to eat seconds at Mum’s

I could start studying but I can’t refuse this invite

I could do the washing but I have shopping to do!

Then there are the bigger things

I could move to a new place but then there’s too much to think about

I could ask my Dad for a loan

I could change careers but what would I do in between?

Or the really big

Those difficult discussions with beloveds

Just who to vote for when no one seems to speak for me

Government decisions:

Refugees who need a place to live in Australia and arrived by boat, park them on an island in the middle of nowhere, and hopefully as we procrastinate as a nation about what to do, it will be forgotten; the fates of these living breathing people!

Education and funding equity

Environment and sustainability

Procrastination is the space between the idea and the moment we act. Sometimes procrastination can last longer than necessary. Sometimes procrastination is when we shape our ideas, our worries away into thoughtful action.

via Daily Prompt: Snack

Left, right,  like not. send a million kisses and snack away

Life whizzes by with a million opportunities,

Maybe you were busy snacking and forgot how sweet we were.

A groaning table

a buffet

so much on offer,

“Perhaps I will just snack, and see what happens?”

They say, somehow to them self

There is no commitment necessary in snacking

you’re only taking a little taste, a bite,

snacking won’t harm my waistline too much

I was never going to have a whole meal

You were a divine snack but I’m not looking for a meal

Just a snack…